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Danni Colello
my blog will show you the mind of a young developing writer.
"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." Maya Angelou
my blog will show you the mind of a young developing writer.
This blog post is touching on what my research project is going to be about. We watched two documentaries that my research project is going to be relating to and referencing throughout called Miss Representation and The Mask You Live In.
My research project is going to be about abusive/ toxic friendships I believe this is a very important very relevant issue pertaining to today’s society and also relating to both documentaries, Miss Representation and The Mask You Live In. These films discuss huge struggles little boys and girls are faced with every day growing up and I think even in these films, abusive friendships weren’t talked about enough. It’s the nurture part of life, these kids are not being properly nurtured in life to the point where they feel compelled to constantly compare themselves to each other and see each other as competition. They need to put on their masks every day and prepare their masks for what they feel is appropriate to show the world. If they are a boy, they are expected to be tough, not cry, etc. If it’s a girl, they are expected to wear makeup and a cute little dress and look perfect. So, these inadvertently become the things that we grow up basing our entire worth and value over and its such a “social norm” we don’t even recognize were conforming to what the media, what the old white powerful men in charge want us to conform to. But this issue is magnified by our friends and peers when we are challenged on the playground to behave a certain way. I mean these friendships are so common and underrated and not discussed nearly enough and we glorify it through media as well, in the hit movie, ”Mean Girls” the entire movie is about a girl pretending to be some popular girl’s friend who is abusive toward her which perpetuates this behavior for other young girls because they see this as “cool” and “the norm” when its completely not. Meanwhile the entire movie this girl is plotting against the abusive popular girl to take her down and is discreetly abusive towards her as well. The protagonist and the antagonist are doing essentially the same thing to each other in different ways and this creates a sense of community for young influential girls that this behavior is what “friends” do. There are so many people that do not even know that a friendship can be abusive. Any relationship can be abusive it must be nurtured and there must be mutual respect and love. Saying “kids will be kids.” Is not any type of excuse these children need to be shown how to properly interact with each other in a healthy way because if we just say, ”That’s kids.” Were perpetuating their future relationships of any kind to tolerate toxic behavior. The change starts with us.
10 Comments
Sabatino
4/3/2019 06:29:46 pm
This post provides insights into your passions and rationales for enacting a research project about toxic relationships. Now that you have composed this discussion about the topic, how might you focus this argument? Will you analyze Mean Girls to illustrate the major types/themes of toxic relationships? Will you propose solutions to solve the issues involved with toxic relationships?
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Danni
4/9/2019 06:15:11 am
i do feel as if i am on to something. A potential research question could be , "Why do abusive friendships go unnoticed in our society?" or "How to stop perpetuating a tolerance of toxic behavior in any relationship." I've already started gathering info from the web. :))
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Julia
4/4/2019 06:47:05 am
You can totally do a research project on toxic friendships/relationships and how it brings people down emotionally and mentally. The two films sort of touched on the negative comments from peers but didn't go into it as much as they probably should've. I would love to see toxic friendships explored a bit more because almost everyone has experienced them.
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danni
4/9/2019 06:04:30 am
I completely agree. and so many people just aren't educated on the fact that friendships can be abusive that even when they are in one they might not recognize it.
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Tiffany S.
4/7/2019 07:18:55 am
Danniiiiiii you’re so right! Abusive/toxic friendships are a very relevant issues pertaining to today’s society. I feel there’s always a light being shined on relationships in the context of significant other but I think we tend to forget that the buddy friendships we make are just as important to our mental space as well.
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Danni
4/9/2019 06:07:42 am
Awwww tiff i love you girl!!! thanks so much for the feed back, I think some kind of therapy (psychedelic therapy perhaps) or a social rehabilitation of some sort are two possibilities, but that would also mean that they would have to be willing.
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Francis
4/8/2019 08:54:17 pm
Yes, show me your friend and I'll tell you who you're. Fake friendship is BAD!
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danni
4/9/2019 06:16:44 am
No abusive friendships anymore. I let go of any negative energy in my life, put out positivity & get it back. now i have friends like you and zahed and angelina and justinee and tiff and everyone else <3
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Zahed I.
4/8/2019 09:33:32 pm
Danni, Julia and Tiffany,
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danni
4/9/2019 06:01:51 am
Heyy Zahed. No thats not exactly what im saying. . we agree that friendship is holy and should be nurtured however a lot of the time the media shows us that friends behave in a toxic way toward each other and that it is okay, which is not true.
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